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Writer's pictureRetah McPherson

Total Dependency on Him

2 Cor 12:9  “But He said to me, My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.”

What a wonderful experience we had this morning. At 5H00 we started to climb the mountain in Hartebeespoort and saw the sun coming up over the dam. There is such a great thankfulness in my heart towards YHVH for being able to walk, to exercise and to be healthy. So many times we take these things for granted. 


 During our December holiday Aldo so badly wanted to go fishing, but bear in mind that he is now a big tall young man. So to get him over the rocks and to the point where he can take the rod and throw in the line  – it was really a struggle. Tinus and I had our hands full to help him not to fall over the rocks in the sea. With much frustration we tried, and tried till we gave up when a drunk man came and jumped into the water pool in the sea, and the fishing rod snapped. Well Aldo snapped with the rod and was so angry and frustrated with his disability, and with the drunken man. We went back home and I sat with him explaining to him that he has  to make peace that he cannot do everything in life the way he used to as a young boy before the accident. So right there I opened a long deep wound of “ I cannot  do anymore”. There came out a lot of anger, frustration and I heard Holy Spirit said to me “allow him to be angry, speak about his pain and then to take responsibility for his life now.”  I had a change to tell him about my pain concerning this matter, and how I also had to deal with that.   

So many lies were hidden in that pain. “How the enemy told him that you can do nothing, you are not good enough, look at the young men around you, see - I just showed you again now you cannot even catch fish like a normal man anymore, you will not be able to do anything – all lies!.”

I sat and listen to all his pain and hidden lies. We started to pray and I asked Holy Spirit to came in and show him the truth, because only the TRUTH can set us free. While I was still praying he gradually went on his knees and started to repent for all the lies that he believed, and all the selfishness in his heart. Thanking Yeshua that he is alive and able to do what He called him to do.

Holy Spirit brought so much peace and we could talk. Aldo, you know, you don’t even need a voice to talk, or fancy words because love speaks louder than words. You don’t need legs or even arms to love – because the eyes of your heart are filled with love. You don’t need to do what the world do to be accepted Aldo, Yeshua except you just the way you are, and his plans for your life does not involved your ability but you’re availability to be used by Him just the way you are. He stared at me and said “Mom, Wisdom just said to me that love opens up heaven on earth”. He said that I must love myself. So all I need is LOVE, do you know mom that LOVE is heavens language.


I took that opportunity to repent to Aldo as well, because of the many times that I was insensitive towards his pain. The Word teaches us to confess our sins not merely to YHVH but also to one another. I could see how much it meant to him that I acknowledge my mistakes and take responsibility, and repent as well. It is so good to be accountable to your children.

Daniel was one of the most righteous characters in the Bible, but when he started to intercede for the people of Israel, he began by acknowledging his own share in their sins. (Dan 9:3-13) 

Only after we start taking responsibility, repenting, humbling ourselves before Yeshua, seeking the answer from Him - He will heal us…..because He is no man that He can lie!

Yeshua want us to be a remnant of sincere, devoted followers of Yeshua. We have to start looking our pain in the eyes and take full responsibility for our lives. To feel sorry for you is not from YHVH. Also to harden your heart is not from Him.  Our pride remains a barrier that holds back the answers to our prayers for us and those around us. To not love yourself is sin, and out of hell. I am not talking about loving you as pride but as loving myself as Yeshua loves me – unconditional.

Through severe dealings of YHVH in my own life, I have learnt the most effective way for us to humble ourselves is to take full responsibility for our actions and to confess our sins. By regularly and specifically confessing our personal sins to Yeshua; it is impossible to approach Him with an attitude of pride. He has committed to forgive us the sins we confess.

 1 John 1:9 “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”

Unconfessed sins are unforgiven sins. That is a huge open door to satan’s lies in your life.

Abba Father, in the name of Yeshua please help us to accept our personal responsibility for what is going on with ourselves and our families. Help us to see the denial in our lives, and to start seeking only the TRUTH – because THE TRUTH shall set us free. I know you want to heel our broken hearts, because the enemy stays in trauma – pain (darkness) and lie to us. I believe you have an amazing plan for all of our lives and that 2014 is going to be a year were we all will be so dependent on you and your voice alone.  We surrender and ask you to take control over our lives and our children lives.

‘ My child, I designed  you to commune with Me face to face because there you will receive revelation, peace, love , forgiveness and all you need. Your soul will be strengthened when you stay in Me. Don’t try to accomplish things in your own strength. To be dependent on Me continually will change your perspective over yourself and everything around you. Have a joyful expectation for 2014 and know that my plans for you are far greater than you can ever think or dream of. I want you to live, move and have your being in Me. I in you and you in Me.  This is what I offer to you this year. It is a love adventure that I offer you – seek Me in all you do!”

While I was in Israel last November Yeshua spoke to me and said” I want you to have a Face to face conference in Jerusalem 2014. I want to bestow My love on my people. I truly believe this is YHVH heart for this year – FACE TO FACE.

I bless you my dear friend with so much love in your heart.

Love Retah and family.  

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